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(ENDED) Which Performer will you choose in “Friends’ Got Talent” Finals? – Win Free Gold Bars!
Comments
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Chewy - stand-up comedy
Thanks for the tag @frenioz00 I can’t believe it’s the finals already. I’ve really surprised myself because I’ve never been a Chewy fan and I was expecting my favourites to be Jelly Queen and Rachel but Chewy had me and the audience and the judges laughing our heads off, his smile seems to have got more endearing too and I can see there are a lot more jokes to come from this cheeky chappie, my favourite joke was the drunk 🤣 thanks for the story once again @Elsa
So drunk he can't stand up…..
An Irishman's been drinking at a pub all night. When he stands up to leave, he falls flat on his face. He tries to stand one more time, but to no avail. Again, he falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside, he stands up and, sure enough, he falls flat on his face. The Irishman decides to crawl the four blocks to his home.
When he arrives at the door, he stands up and falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door into his bedroom. When he reaches his bed, he tries one more time to stand up. This time, he manages to pull himself upright but he quickly falls right into bed. He is sound asleep as soon as his head hits the pillow.
He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him, shouting, "So, you've been out drinking again!"
"Why do you say that?" he asks innocently.
"The pub called. You left your wheelchair there again."
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Chewy - stand-up comedy
Hm, I can't edit my post anymore but oh yes!
My favorite joke from Chewy is "My classroom teacher made me stand up in front of the class for being a nuisance during the lesson. She held her pointer stick towards me and said, "At the end of this stick, there is an idiot!" I got detention after asking which end."
I found this was absolutely hilarious because, well, everyone has those times where they'd like to be snarky. I can't count how many times I've been snarky when I was younger 😳. (Well . . . I must admit, I am still just as snarky 😂)
Anyways, that's my favorite joke from Chewy! What's yours, everyone?
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Chewy - stand-up comedy
Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars until a policeman approached him and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the boy replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business." Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The boy replied, "Why, yes."
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
